July 7, 2009

Happy Holidays, You Bastard

Friday morning I woke up early. Filled with anticipation I began pulling out sleeping bags, chairs, and ice chests from storage. I suddenly started to feel a bit queasy so returned to bed for a few more hours of shut eye. I woke some time later with a raging migraine, stumbling to the bathroom I was met by an unexpected visitor.
That bitch Aunt Flow couldn't have waited until after the weekend to ruin my life for the next 5 days? I marked tampons on my list of things to pick up at the store, and went about my business after taking upwards of 1,000 mg of Tylenol.
We arrived at our camp site after sweating it out for nearly 3 hours in the truck. It was a beautiful, cloudless sky, with temperatures somewhere in the 90's. We began unloading the truck when out of nowhere a flash flood tore through the campground destroying everything in its path.We took shelter in the truck for about an hour while our bags, blankets, and tents were demolished.
Within minutes the sky was blue and the sun returned. Determined to have a good time we did our best to salvage the firewood and shook the tent dry.
The rest of the evening was enjoyable, as we barbecued, drank, and enjoyed family we rarely see.

I awoke Saturday with a stiff neck and a sore throat, not to mention cramps and a blinding headache from my period. I hadn't slept well, but then again I never sleep well while camping so I got up, had a cup of coffee, and begin feeling better.
Husband and I went on a beautiful hike, and took the kayaks out on the lake. The sun's rays stung my white legs, but it felt so good.
Back at camp my father-in-law was preparing lunch, and I decided to lay down for a nap. Waking I felt worse then I did before laying down. My entire body was achy, I had a fever, my throat was raw, and I was shivering excessively even though it was hot as hell.
I had the flu. First the period, then the flood, and now the damn flu.
Husband suggested we just go home, but I didn't want to ruin the weekend for him to so I said I would try and ride it out. We didn't drive all that way to miss the fireworks either.
I spent the rest of the day puking, shivering, and trying not to move since my entire body felt bruised.

At 10pm the fireworks finally began, yet I was bundled up in my sleeping bag, with ear plugs jammed into my ears, praying for silence so the migraine might subside. After the fireworks, husband returned to find me passed out with puke in my hair, and along the side of my sleeping bag. He picked me up, put me in the car, packed up all our shit, and drove me home.

So, all together it was a pretty unsuccessful holiday weekend. One of the worst in fact. But upon reminiscing I have to laugh a bit. It was certainly unforgettable and after the hell I raised at the restaurant, quite ironic.

How was everyone else's holiday weekend? Got a story to top mine?


Anonymous said...

That sounds like hell! I just wrote a post about how it sucked to work on the fourth, but I would take standing around in boredom over puking and bleeding simultaneously.

Bryna said...

Hey, at least you weren't puking at work!

SkippyMom said...

I am so, so sorry. You sounded so miserable. Your husband was a sweetie tho' - and a good sport [as were you].

Hey - I know this won't help when you feel as miserable as you did this weekend, but for future camping trips you should try the 4-in-1 Coleman quickbed. I always slept like crud camping [although I love camping] and these are wonderful for a good nights sleeps. Check them out online there are reviews everywhere and they are only $32 a set.

Sorry again about the weekend.

purplegirl said...

Fucking reproductive cycle!

Miz Dinah said...

See this is why I don't camp. I love your blog; I just read it from finish to start. I'm so glad I'm not in customer service anymore. :)

schmuckraker said...

Love the site, I added you!


Anonymous said...

I'm so sad for you, especially after all that trouble to get the time off to go camping. Feel better!!!

Jealous Bitch said...

HILARIOUS!!! Thanks stopping by and for sharing the love!!


Bella said...

what a horror story for you. Hope you are feeling better. Can't top that one, just got crazy here.

Wide Lawns said...

Ughh, that's awful. I hope you feel better now. I get period headaches too. I wonder what it is. Hormones or something? Thanks for the link!

Wendy said...

Oh, that is awful. Just awful. It makes our last camping trip with dirty drunk hillbillies seem like a walk in the park.